A Typical Night in New York

Illustration by Leesa Leva.

From: Alex Ghersi
Date: 25/10/2007 11:17 a.m.

yesterday i had the craziest night, i was walking to my dorm and this guy was asking some other guy how to get to webster hall, that concert venue and i walk up to him; i'm like "i know where it is" . so i kind of walk him there and ask him what he's gonna see...
he's like "new pornographers"
i'm like..."Wow lucky" 
he's all "wanna come? i have an extra ticket"
i'm like WOW WTFX OK.
so i go in this concert and i'm super nice to him give him cigs and ask about his life and all this and he starts buying me drinks
then you butt sexed him
he was like 30 all the executive type...kind of sad lonely but very funny guy. self deprecating
slowly he's getting SHIT FACED
he can't stand up straight by the time the new pornos come on and
i'm like "hey tell me when you wanna go home"
and he's all "YES PLZ NOW"
so i put his arm around my shoulder and he is fucking falling all over the place
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHHGF
and here i am walking this stranger to the subway station and
he is like "OH MY GOD I'M SO SORRY"
i'm like "it's ok man just enjoy. it's fine"
and people are staring at me
wow you are such a nice person
and i'm like "hey would you rather take a cab?" and he agrees drunkenly so i ask him like 10 times PLEASE TELL ME WHERE YOU LIVE and then he was all paranoid like "WHY DOES IT MATTER WHERE I LIVE?" and i'm like "...so you get home" ..he's all "oh. ok" but he's too drunk to remember so after the first cab that drives off (they don't like drunk people in their cabs) i just shove him into the next one and tell him "SAY WHERE YOU LIVE"... but i felt so bad that i hid behind the building and stared at the cab until it started moving.
it started moving a little so i felt relieved but then it stops again and after 15 minutes i walk up to him and the cabbie is fucking enraged and calling 911 telling me the cops will come get him so i'm like OK WAIT WILL HE GET IN TROUBLE? and this guy is smashed in the back saying he's so sorry. and the cabbie is like no he'll be fine just stop wasting my time
HHQHhHAHAA
so the cops pull up and i just run because i can not afford to fuck up. a student, meeting a stranger, we just drank, etc... nyu the sirens freaked me out so i felt all bad but the people at the door said i was a good person and they let me back in so i caught half of the show and it was still
kind of fun
but i sent him an email as soon as i got home since he had given it to me. he was so lonely.
he moved here 6 months ago it turns out and he is legally blind, with some optic nerve genetic disease and all i never felt pity for him though, just this really piercing sadness.
i empathized-- i mean, he missed home, was confused, his girlfriend had just left him... boy, life can be hard.

MP3:
Psapp
"Sad Song"